Forget-Me-Not

Myosotis sylvatica

by Elly van Ekelenburg

This flower belongs to the Borage family. The plant is an annual, and comes back every year through tiny seeds which are very light and are spread by the wind throughout a great area. It can grow about 10 cm and has tiny heavenly blue flowers. Meditating with this flower helps you feel Mother Earth and Heaven. It's a very spiritual flower, as evidenced by her name.

My first meeting with this delicate little blue flower was in my grandmother's garden. I remember her as an old, warm grandmother, caring for her children and grandchildren. At her farm there was a garden with fruit trees, vegetables, and some flowers along the paths. One of the flowers growing there was Forget-Me-Not. When there was something to celebrate she always asked me to make the bowls of flowers; she said, "Elly is good with flowers."

That remark came to mind after I had worked with flower essences for some time. She never could know that her words would have a very special meaning. I think, being in Heaven for sure, she can see me writing now about her garden-and she will smile and give me some help with this piece.

This last part is my most important experience with Forget-Me-Not. I met the essence during the Intensive Program in 1987. The students learned something about USA laws and practicing flower essences, and the laws in The Netherlands are different. So I had some "time off." I asked Richard if I could have a look at the research essences. I "found" the Forget-Me-Not essence and started to meditate with it.

After some time, something very emotional happened. I saw my aunt, who passed away some years before. I had a strong bond with her and I was with her for some hours before she died. She was very much in pain, suffering from cancer. She could not eat, drink, or speak anymore. People around her did not want her to die. She was a nun, had worked in several parts of the world as a sister and nurse, and meant much to the family. As I sat next to her I took her hand, started to talk with her in my mind, without speaking. Then something strange happened. She could hear my unspoken words through pinching my hand. I told her that her task was fulfilled and that she could go to sleep and go to her Lord. I gave her a big hug and went home. The next day my mother called me and said my aunt had died that evening. I felt very confused, but also very peaceful.

So, sitting on the other side of the world, meditating with the Forget-Me-Not, she came to me and told me she was all right and happy.

Then she took somebody else by the hands. It was Henk, the brother of my husband Hans, who had committed suicide some days before I went to the USA. I could not go to his funeral because my plane left on the same day and I had decided to go to the Flower Essence Intensive Program. That was not an easy decision. I wanted to be with Hans and his mother. I wrote a poem for Henk which Hans recited at the funeral. In my meditation, my aunt had Henk with her. He could not talk. My aunt told me he was all right and they both would keep in touch. This was a very spiritual and heavenly experience, learning that Forget-Me-Not, at least for me, could make contact with people who had died.

I bought two stock bottles of Forget-Me-Not. I gave one to Janeen, one of the other participants that I met at the Intensive and loved right away. I am sure I knew her from another lifetime. We agreed to keep in touch. She gave me some earrings made from pineapple seeds, and they also were called Forget-Me-Not. We write to each other, we once visited her, and we stay in touch on all levels, sometimes through the stars.

The other bottle I took home to my practice and asked the essence to let me know when she was needed.

A woman, Anja, came to me suffering from a severe headache. My way of selecting flower essences is to concentrate on the person and find flower essences with my intuition. First I found Bleeding Heart. I asked her if she had lost somebody near to her recently. Anja told me her father had died some time ago and she missed him. The next essence I found was Star of Bethlehem. When I put the essence before her she started to cry. She told me this was the first time since the funeral she was able to. Because she was not able to cry, her tears were blocked and I found this was the cause of her headache. Not being able to cry can cause headaches and in a worse form, can cause cataracts (this happens more to men than women; women are allowed to cry, men are not). She told me she was sorry she could not speak to him anymore. She wanted to tell him some things she never told him. Bleeding Heart was selected.

Then the Forget-Me-Not, as promised, came into my mind. I let Anja feel the essence and she felt very comforted by it. After selecting essences for people, I will take the essences in my hand and treat the person. Suddenly I saw Anja's father before me. I told her if she wanted, I could make contact with her and her father. She did not want to at that moment. I told her to call whenever she was ready. She left, and took the essences for some weeks. She could cry again and her headache disappeared. She also paid a visit to her father's grave, cried, and talked to him. Afterwards she felt better. She could release her father and have contact with him without grief and less pain in her heart.

Some weeks ago, Anja came for a consultation for her daughter Anneloes, who did not feel right and missed her grandfather, whom she had never seen because she was born after he died. "Remembering" Forget-Me-Not, I took the essence, concentrating on the girl, and the essence, and got the message: You can write, with your mother, a letter to your grandfather. Tell him everything you want and make a drawing for him. Your mother will send the letter to your grandfather by special Angel-post. I gave her the Forget-Me-Not essence and some others relating to issues she needed at this time in her life.

Anneloes is doing much better now.

The next case study about Forget-Me-Not, I recall the Grandfather Willems case. A mother came to me with her son, Jesper, 4 years old, who in the past months suffered from extreme angry mood swings, and agitation. Jesper was using abusive language to his parents, his teacher, and others. Nobody could find a cause or a reason for his outbursts. Jesper also had problems going to sleep. I talked to him but he started to curse and swear.

In selecting essences, I found Saint John's Wort and told the mother this essence would protect her son during the night and during dreams. Then she told me, "Maybe you'll think this strange, but I do not know how to handle this part of his life. Jesper sometimes dreams about a grandfather Willems who lives in Paris. Jesper did not know his grandparents. They passed away before he was born, and we never were in Paris. We tried to find out who this grandfather Willems was, but he never existed."

So, I asked Jesper about Grandfather Willems; where he lived, what he looked like, and what they did together. Jesper could describe the man perfectly. They sat under a tree in Paris and talked about things Jesper did not remember afterwards. The moment we began talking about the grandfather, Jesper's attitude changed. He became more quiet and calmer. Forget-Me-Not announced herself again. I took the essence and told Jesper he would get some of this flower to help him during his life, and maybe he could dream about grandfather Willems another time. Jesper accepted this, and I finished the counseling session.

At the door I said to Jesper, "When you meet grandfather Willems again, will you give him my regards?" He told me he would do so and he even gave me a hand. Sometime later, his mother told me Jesper's behavior changed immediately after they went home. He became quieter, and did not scold anymore. I asked her if she knew if Jesper ever had another dream about grandfather Willems. As far as she knew he had not, and was glad Jesper was healed.

I cannot really explain the dynamics of this particular healing process, but I know it did heal. I am grateful the Forget-Me-Not essence was such a benefit in my treatment with Jesper, that I was able to make contact through "his grandfather in Paris," and heal the boy.

Another case study with Forget-Me-Not, in which the client did not take the essence internally, concerned a woman called Heleen.

In one of my courses I described the Forget-Me-Not essence and my experience with her. Sometime later, Petra, one of the students, called me for help with a girlfriend who lost her mother. Her girlfriend, Heleen, never had a chance to say farewell to the body, because her mother died in Spain during a holiday.

Heleen had a hard time dealing with this issue. She also wondered where her mother was now. During that time she also was trying to get pregnant, and Petra had the feeling that Heleen first had to say good-bye to her mother before she would get pregnant. Petra asked me if she could buy a bottle of Forget-Me-Not to give to her friend, not knowing if she would take the essence or not. I told her Heleen could put the bottle near the picture of her mother and the essence would do her work. Heleen accepted this present and placed the essence near the photograph of her mother.

Some months later, Heleen went on a short vacation, staying in a friend's house in Switzerland. She had a dream. Heleen was alone in the kitchen doing the dishes, amongst many children. Heleen was near her mother and her mother told her, "I'm doing fine, I like it where I am and everything is all right" Heleen could keep that moment and when she woke up she felt like she had the opportunity to say good-bye to her mother and now knew that her mother was in a good place.

Some time later Heleen got pregnant, but miscarried after nine weeks. Having much pain in her heart and soul, she was not able to get pregnant again until she experienced another "Forget-Me-Not dream," this time about the child she lost. The baby was lying in a cradle, smiled at its mother, and Heleen then knew it was all right and felt at peace. A short time after the dream she got pregnant again. She gave birth to a girl, which they named after her mother.

I think Forget-Me-Not allows the possibility to make contact on several levels with people who've died. Giving people the opportunity to deal with pain and grief, especially when Forget-Me-Not is combined with Bleeding Heart, helps to make another bond. Instead of desperately wanting the beloved one back, Bleeding Heart heals through letting go of the broken-heartedness, and leaving the deceased person in peace. Everyone has his or her reason to die.

Forget-Me-Not helps have contact on a spiritual, more heavenly level. People who die go to another dimension where they work out their issues, get the rest they need, or do whatever they need to do. One can help them with this, sending healing energy to them, light and love. And when they are ready and want to stay in touch, one can have contact with them, talk to them, and they will answer in their own way. They are able to help the people who've stayed on Earth to get on with their lives. They can always be asked for help.

I am grateful Forget-Me-Not came into my life at the moment I needed it, and I hope it is a dedication to this flower that I am able to help many people, and to let them experience the benefits of her healing qualities.

When I'm working with Forget-Me-Not on myself, it makes it possible for me to go into past lives, picking up old parts of my soul. The pain in this life has its causes in past lives in which issues were not healed or worked out, and those issues need to be healed in this lifetime. That's not an easy challenge to work on. Sometimes the essence gives me insight into my healing qualities from times before-and that also can put you to work.

Every year Hans and I camp at the same campsite during the summer weekends. Two years ago we met "Mr. G," a 46-year-old man who had been living at the campsite for years. He was very special in his own unique way. Mr. G was very tall and stout, with a loud voice that annoyed other campers when they first met him. But as he was a man of such good humor, people learned to accept him as he was.

He did a lot for the children of the campsite. He had a lovely wife and two sons, aged 16 and 18. Mr. G was suffering from a bad form of diabetes and his heart and lungs got sick. His body would not stand surgery so he slowly got more and more ill. Last year everyone (including himself) knew he was going to die.

I started thinking a lot about Mr. G and contacted people who visited him. Even though we were not very close, somehow I had the feeling I had to do something for Mr. G.. I knew he and his family were not religious, nor were they familiar with alternative healing, so it was difficult to find some way to help. As they or hardly anyone knew about my healing work, I did not know what I " HAD" to do, but it looked like a call from heaven.

One morning I woke up very early and I knew what to do. I wrote a small letter and posted it the same evening on our way home, hoping it would reach him before he died.

I wrote:

Maybe you think it strange to receive a letter from me. I heard you are not able to go on with your life. Just want to thank you for what you did for the campsite and the children. And I just KNOW that you can take care of your wife and children at the place where you go to now.

Also I think some little angels up there are waiting for some one to play games with them, like you did at the campsite, but please do not shout too loud because otherwise they will fall off their clouds.

And I wished him "good bye".

What I actually did was tell him a part of the qualities of the Forget-Me-Not flower essence. We heard about his death a few days later, so I did not know if my letter had reached him in time. We attended his cremation.

While paying our condolences to the family, the sons came to me and thanked me for my letter. I asked them if it had arrived it in time, and they said yes, just a few hours before he died. They said their mother read it for him as Mr. G was not able to read anymore.

Was it of any benefit? I asked. Yes, the boys said in tears. "Father and we became more peaceful and we all got more relaxed." Some hours later he died.

I have the feeling Mr. G. left this life a bit easier, knowing he was able to take care of his family even after death. I gave him the Forget-Me-Not energy by mail and the energy continues to help Mr. G and his family.

My conclusion after working twelve years intensively with this special essence is that Forget-Me-Not also means: I will not forget you.

About Elly van Ekelenburg

"First I discovered flower essences, and then I started my practice," Elly van Ekelenburg, a Dutch practitioner, explained. "I experienced physical problems, when I was about age 30. I exhibited strange symptoms for which no doctor could provide answers. At last I found a healer working with flower essences and he helped me find the causes of my dis-eases."

Elly discovered part of her health problems stemmed from energies she absorbed from others. "This healer helped me to discover the difference between my own problems and the problems of others. It was a very great relief. Then he told me being able to feel other peoples' energies was a gift I could also work with. After hesitating for a long time I took my first flower essence course."

According to Elly, one of the specific reasons she started her practice was to spread the healing qualities of flower essences.

In her practice, which she began in May 1985, Elly utilizes flower essences, hands on healing, and psychological counseling. "Occasionally I use essential oils. For example, for a client with severe sleeping problems I will add Lavender essential oil in their treatment as well as essences. This helps both the body and the mind to heal."

Elly cited sleeping problems, ADHD with children, depression, relationship problems, incest trauma, grief therapy, sexuality issues, and whiplash among those issues she frequently encounters. Many people with skin diseases come to her.

"The most significant thing about flower essences for me is they help the client and the healer to find the cause of dis-ease and work with the client as a WHOLE," she said. "The attention does not go to the dis-ease but to the soul and the heart of the client. We do not cure the dis-ease but help to heal the PERSON."

Elly said she prepares dosage bottles for all her clients. "I also tell them flower essences can be added to a bath and/or applied topically, but most of my clients use the essences orally."

Elly reported achieving "remarkable results" using Comfrey and Arnica flower essences with whiplash clients. One woman suffering a severe headache came to see her for help. "Tuning in on her I found Arnica and asked her if she had a traumatic fall during her life. She told me she had once, while rock and roll dancing, when her dancing partner dropped her. Her neck was injured and doctors diagnosed whip lash. She was never able to dance again and she could not turn her head as before."

Elly held a bottle of Arnica essence near the client's neck. "Immediately I could feel energy flowing again. Then I took the Comfrey essence and this made her feel even better. When she came back for her next appointment she was very enthusiastic because her headache was gone, she could turn her head like she could before the dancing accident, and her physiotherapist said the problems she had with her muscles and nerve system were improved. After some time she even was able to dance again!"

In another case, there was a man who had an operation on his leg, and the doctors accidentally cut a nerve during the procedure. As a result, he was not able to walk as before. This cost him his job.

"After using Arnica (for the abrupt cutting of the nerve) and Comfrey, (for healing the ethereal level of the nerve) he was able to use his leg much more," Elly said. "After some time he found a job again and is now working as a gardener-surrounded by the plants he loves so much."

"A medical doctor heard about these healings and came to see me too," Elly continued. "She was very critical of every form of alternative healing. But she hadn't experienced any relief for her whiplash, suffered after a car accident, and she came because she was so desperate. After using Arnica and Comfrey for some months she felt much better than before. Even her headaches disappeared and before she moved to another town she asked me for some extra bottles. This experience made her less critical of alternative healing ways!"

Women and children form the bulk of Elly's clientele, she said, although more men have come to her for help in recent years. On occasion, Elly will also treat animals. She uses flower essences, gem elixirs and essential oils in her practice.

"Some years ago my husband was hit by a big piece of concrete," she recalled. "This injured one of his fingers very badly. After going to the First Aid, and getting an x-ray to make certain there were no pieces of concrete left in the finger, he came home with a big cut that hurt very bad. I dropped Five Flower Formula essence and Comfrey right from the stock bottle, into the wound. The pain disappeared almost at once and the finger healed even without leaving a scar."

In treating clients recovering from strokes Elly prescribes a combination of Arnica, Comfrey, and Star of Bethlehem. She notes this remedy helps to heal the grief which often appears after a stroke, of not being able to live and act as before. She sometimes adds Bush Fuchsia, an Australian Bush Essence, to her stroke combination.

"One man who came to me could not read or write, had trouble with speaking, seeing, had bad co-ordination, and memory. My intuition told me to add Bush Fuchsia to his dosage bottle to help with a left and right brain connection problem. After taking these drops for some weeks he was able to play cards with friends again, which was a great improvement in his condition. Because this combination worked so well I advised it to more practitioners working with stroke victims. Every client has his or her own unique problems dealing with a stroke so of course individual essences are selected too," she explained.

"As a tool, flower essences are a help when clients deny they have a 'negative' emotion," Elly said. "You can speak about the quality of an essence without directly mentioning the clients problem. Essences give people insight into their problems. They can heal pain and clear blockages from a very long time ago. Flower essences help you to take responsibility for your life."

Elly has noticed when clients wear an essence bottle near the body, for example, in a pocket or under a pillow, the healing energy is still effective.

In 1987 Elly participated in the FES Practitioner Intensive which she described as "one of the best experiences of my entire life...the whole journey helped me to find my healing soul." In 1989 she attended the Advanced Practitioners Weekend and in 1991 Elly enjoyed the Special Topics Seminar where she gave a presentation about Evening Primrose essence. She was certified as a flower essence practitioner by FES in 1989.

Elly has taught flower essence classes at her home since 1991.