Father and Fathering
Essence
Description
disturbed relationship to father, often involving abuse or abandonment; unable to trust in goodness of the world due to lack of guidance or protection from father
drive to accumulate material wealth, status or power which overshadows the interpersonal values of family and children
assuming responsibility for role of provider but later feeling overwhelmed and despondent; very helpful for new fathers
difficulty assuming fatherly responsibilities due to arrested emotional development in childhood; resentment of wife's motherly attention to children, wants attention for oneself
remaining aloof from family and role as father due to preoccupation with other-worldly spiritual values; bringing more warmth and love into family life
difficulty conveying confidence or authority in father role; doubting own capacities
internalizing much guilt and self-blame due to overly strict or harsh father; self-deprecation which prevents full realization of own fathering capacities
unresolved psychological wounds or abuse from own childhood which prevents emotional expression or vulnerability; emotionally unavailable in father role
internal conflict about role of father, especially in balancing strength and love; vacillating between strict disciplinarian or permissive father
realizing elder wisdom in one's father or other important male figures; ability to reflect and learn from own experience as a father
conflict with or abuse from father, grandfather or other males in family lineage, resulting in alienation from father role; healing one's relationship with ancestral family and elders
episodes of rage or power battles with child; feeling powerless as father due to own unresolved issues about anger and power
general remedy for healing relationship with one's father and self-image internalized from father
difficulty in making a commitment to family, community and living environment; fathers who are absent, travel often, or frequently relocate or uproot family
exerting harsh or extreme control over children; feeling a need to be dominant in father role
relating to children in a playful way by contacting one's own childlike nature; to counterbalance workaholism or other ways of avoiding children and one's inner child
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